Friday, August 28, 2009

9 Reasons to Join Him

Clay and I proudly attended Auburn University, and we loved Game Day as students. We tailgated, dressed in orange, and cheered for the team every Saturday in the Fall. I guess I just thought that would change after we graduated.

But I didn't realize Clay's devotion to Auburn football until it was too late. I was already legally bound to him for life when I discovered that all his plans in the Fall revolve around the Auburn schedule. He is shocked when people plan weddings during a game. He checks the blogs and Web sites for inside information. He watches all the pre-game stuff and of course, the post-game analysis. There's more, but you get the point. He loves it.

I went through a few stages of dealing with his behavior.

1. Denial - "Oh, he's not that bad. This is a big game."
2. Shock - "Who have I married?"
3. Resistance - "He will just have to change."
4. Rage - "I refuse to miss my Dad's birthday party because Auburn is playing Louisiana Tech!"
5. Acceptance - "War Eagle. What time does the game start?"

Whatever stage you are in right now, I urge you to just go ahead and accept it. Join him. Buy a cute game day outfit and make some spinach dip. Plop down on the couch or load up the car. Game day is on its way!

9 Reasons to Join Your Husband in His Love for the Team:

1. It's more strategic to save your complaining for something important, like negotiating a higher clothing budget.

2. Chilli dogs at the games are delicious.

3. Game day outfits can be cute, if you use a little creativity.

4. Tailgating rocks!

5. Other guys think you are a cool wife.
6. Five hours with your spouse is always a treat, even if it involves yelling at the referees, kicking the television, crying, pouting, and shouting. At least you are together.

7. Commercials on ESPN are hilarious.

8. Falling asleep during the game is perfectly acceptable.

9. Where else can two minutes last thirty minutes? The end of a game is like the Twilight Zone where time stands still. You should experience that phenomenon for yourself.

Wednesday, August 26, 2009

Husband-Pleasing Recipes in 15 Minutes or Less

Clay just walked into the kitchen and watched me make Puppy Chow, aka Chex Muddy Buddies, and he was disappointed.

"I thought those took a long time to make," he laughed. "I'm not impressed anymore."

Oh well, he was impressed for ten years. The jig is up on that one, but I have plenty of treats I can whip up in a couple of minutes that make him so happy. I might sound like June Cleaver to even post something like this, but I am the opposite of her. I've never pretended to be a chef, or even a cook, but I do like to make Clay feel special.

Here are ten recipes men love, and women love to make:
1. Rice Krispie Treats - It's not rocket science, but who cares? They are easy, delicious, and quick. Throw in some sprinkles or chocolate chips and any man will be impressed.
2. No-Bake Cool Whip Pies - If you can make Jell-O, you can make these pies. Pick up some Cool Whip and a Graham Cracker Crust and you're set.
3. Homemade Salsa - The only difficult thing about this recipe is getting out the food processor. There are a million recipes like this one, but all involve diced tomatoes, lime, and cilantro. How can you go wrong?
4. Salad with Fruit and Poppyseed Dressing - Something about mixing fruit with a salad makes men thing you are very savy in the kitchen. Add almonds or pecans and they will nominate you for an appearance on a cooking show.
5. Wedge Salad - Cut some lettuce in half and drizzle ranch or blue cheese dressing on top. You're a genius!
6. Banana Split - I think this one reminds him of time with his grandparents, but it's fun for everyone. If you can find good bowls, it cuter.
7. Banana Bread - With the leftover bananas, make banana bread. It's so easy and makes the house smell like 1957.
8. Fondue - You know you got a set of fondue pots (or five) when you got married. Put those babies to good use.
9. Chocolate-Covered Strawberries - The only time involved here is letting the strawberries completely dry. Other than that, it's a five-minute process.
10. Real Cocoa - Check out the recipe on the back of the cocoa. It involves milk, so beware. Apparently cocoa is not made with water, mix and tiny freeze-dried marshmallows.

Sunday, August 16, 2009

Superwife When Husband is out of Town

Why do I get so much done when Clay is out of town? I even cleaned out my junk drawer, as you can see from the BEFORE and AFTER pics.

I can't figure it out.

It's not like I have to take care of Clay (that much). He doesn't really distract me. It seems like I would get the exact amount done when he is in the house... especially on Sunday. Clay generally naps and watches golf, football, or baseball on Sunday. He stays completely out of my hair.

These are my guesses:

1. When I see him sleeping on the couch, I want to join him. I can't resist a cuddle opportunity.

2. I can't "putter" when he is here. Puttering is a word I learned from Alexandra Stoddard, and it means to wander around just doing little things in no particular order. I like to do this in fuzzy socks so that I can slide across the kitchen floor all day.

3. I feel obligated to eat something other than cereal for dinner when Clay is home.

4. I can't vacuum at the EXACT time I want to because I might wake him.

5. Clay forces me to talk to him, thus eating up my productive day.

6. If Clay pets Shelby, I feel obligated to pet her, too... so that we can have family time.

7. If he is looking for something, I alwatys help him. I'm so sweet.

8. If he finds a movie on TNT, like The Notebook, I feel compelled to watch it for the 48th time, even if we have it on DVD.

Monday, August 10, 2009

Love is a Verb

In April, Gary Chapman's book, Love is a Verb, hit the stores. One of the chapters is about Clay, me and the remote control. Actually, remove the word REMOTE because it's really about CONTROL.

Even with three televisions, DVR, and DVD players, it seems like the issue of who will control the TV will always be an issue in marriage. Now, it's just funny because we race to the "good couch" to call dibs on the "good TV" and get the best spot to watch sports or sit-coms. I love how things that once seemed so important now just make us laugh until our sides hurt!